Silent Night
by andafterall
Summary: The decisions we make always leave a mark, but sometimes it's good to forget who we are for a few minutes, one hour, one night. A moment that neither of them thought much about afterwards, but some memories will always remain. Tyler/Elena one-shot during the summer after her parents's death, and before the Pilot.


**A/N: So, I've had this headcanon for quite a while, and I love the idea of them being together so much! Not dating, but moments like this one. English is not my first language, and I've never written smut before, so... I hope you guys enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any The Vampire Diaries characters (as much as I wished for it sometimes.)**

_Don't need another perfect lie_

_Don't care if critics never jump in line_

_I'm gonna give all my secrets away_

_Got no reason_

_Got no shame_

_Got no family_

_I can blame_

_Just don't let me disappear_

_**Secrets - OneRepublic**_

* * *

One week since she had been able to be inside a car again. Two weeks since people stoped calling twenty times a day. Three weeks since she had broken up with Matt Donovan. Four weeks since her whole world had fallen apart.

"Are you okay, sweetie?" her aunt's voice passed through her ears like someone had turned down the volume's button. Elena was sitting on her window's seat looking outside, but focusing on nothing.

"Sure, Jenna. I'm fine." It was the automatic answer. She turned a little to face her aunt, and smiled. Elena had figured in the last few weeks that this was what took to them to leave her alone. It was slowly becoming easy to fake what she was feeling.

"If you need anything, just call me, okay? I'll be downstairs trying to come up with something for dinner." A little nod, and she was gone. She felt envious of Jenna, to be honest. It would be nice to have dinner to worry about. "Oh, I forgot, are you going to the Lockwood's party tonight?" The blonde shouted from the stairs.

The thing in this town is that you always had somewhere to go. Parties, events, balls... Celebrations were never enough. "Maybe. I'm gonna talk to Bonnie." she shouted back, her voice a little rough for lack of use.

And just like that, she had lied to her aunt twice in less than five minutes. What would be the point of telling the truth, though? Jenna was lovely, she was doing everything she could to make sure her and Jer were okay, even if that meant leaving her old life behind and coming to take care of two teenagers. And she had lost her sister and brother-in-law, of course. But she didn't get it. None of them did, not even Jeremy.

Matt tried to be there, but after the break-up he had backed off a little, understandable, even so because Elena asked him for space. Caroline was always busy with her own things, and if she was being honest, it had been a while since the two of them had been really close. Her best support was Bonnie, but even she respected the times that Elena needed to be alone. The thing is, none of them had seen their own parents drowing, and survived while they were left there to die.

Elena felt her eyes watering, and quickly wiped them with her sleeve. "Stupid tears." she muttered. Always crying, always miserable, that was Elena Gilbert. She had no fucking right to cry, she was alive. Those tears didn't belong to her.

She jumped up and looked in the mirror, seeing nothing but an emptyness inside her eyes. An eagerness to break that glass that reflected everything she did _not_ want to see came, but Elena couldn't scare her aunt. It would be selfish - just like everything she does. One of the reasons she preferred to say everything was fine instead of telling the truth, it was because the concern of others was too much to bear. No one was saying, but she knew what everyone thought … if she hadn't gone to that stupid party, if she hadn't fallen out with Matt, if she hadn't called them … Miranda and Grayson Gilbert would still be alive. Everyone wanted to spare her, but that was the real story. She had killed her parents.

Elena had to leave the house. Now. She took a quick shower and put on some jeans shorts with a green lacy top, no makeup or accessories. The only thing that took her a few minutes was straightening her hair, but it was one of the only things that calmed her in the past few weeks, so she made sure to do it. She looked at her brother's room through the bathroom door, and watched the empty bed. An usual scene in the last month, Jeremy was hardly ever at home, but who was she to judge?

When she was ready, she went to the kitchen door and announced "Jenna, I'm going to that party, okay?" she said, trying to sound a little bit excited. "I don't know at what time I'll be back."

* * *

The initial plan was to just take a walk, get some fresh air, and try to clean up the mind , but when she came to her senses, the surroundings of the Lockwood property came to her view, alongside the loud music and the sound of laughter. She saw Tyler, the owner of the party, drinking several shots, and wondered how good it would be to turn off the rational side of the mind and just get drunk, and Elena decided to go walking through the woods next to the house before letting them see her. One of the advantages of living in a small town was that almost all children of the same age grown together and were used to go to each other's houses a lot, even if they grown apart after a certain age. Therefore she knew the back entrance of the mansion and didn't need to pass through the crowd before entering it to go to the bathroom.

The brunette went upstairs after that, and took a glass that was in the hallway, without really caring about its content. She drank it and started walking, until seeing that one of the many doors were open, just like the window inside, allowing the moonlight to fill the room.

Elena entered it and went to the window, realizing that the moon was full. Exactly the same as May 29th. It was the same piece of gray ball that saw the car of her parents fall from the bridge and watched as the water filled their lungs and their brains had shut down. It was not fair. Earth's natural satellite continued to exist, as if nothing had changed, but that was not true. What once reminded her of romantic things, now was just a reminder of all she had lost. That anger from before wanted to surface again, the tears almost winning the battle and blurring her vision, until she heard noise and laughter coming closer.

"Wow, it's always good to find a hot chick in my … Elena?" the boy exclaimed. He entered the room and approached her, looking a little tipsy, but not really drunk. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

"Ty, I'm sorry, I didn't know this was your room. I was just walking down the hall and I ended up getting distracted and in here." she tried to put her face back to normal. "I'll leave." she walked toward the door, but stopped when he grabbed her arm.

"You can… stay if you want. I didn't know you were coming to the party, not after … well, you all right?" he said, a little more serious than before, dropping her arm and looking into her eyes, waiting for an answer.

"Sure, Tyler. Everything is fine." she smiled automatically, as usual. "I just wanted to leave the house a little.". She avoided looking directly at the boy, but felt his closeness even though he was not touching her anymore.

"If this is your story." he laughed, staring at the cup in his hands and looking like he was thinking about something. "Here, drink some, Gilbert. I'm sure that if you don't feel better, it'll at least numb the bad thoughts." he raised the red cup and offered it to her, moving his eyebrows as if daring her to drink.

Elena looked at him trying to understand what he wanted, or what was his game. She expected a hug or a look of pity, like everyone else did, and not an invitation to dive into alcohol. It reminded her of a similar party when they were about 12 years old and the Founding events (which were formerly always an excuse to play with the rest of the kids) had begun to be boring as hell. Tyler told the group - Matt, Elena, Caroline, Bonnie and Ticki at the time - to wait for him in the woods, and appeared some time later with two bottles of beer and a grin on his face. They had never drunk, and the fear of being caught made everything more exciting. When the bottles were empty and they all a little dizzy, Caroline suggested a game where they would spin the bottle and people would have to kiss each other. And that was Elena's first kiss, with Tyler Lockwood, the boy who always loved to show off in front of others, but had quiet, soft lips. It was sloppy and they laughed about it then, but that was the first time in five years that the memory surfaced again.

"And why, exactly, do you think I would be lying about being fine?" she snapped, a little irritated about his attitude. Who was he to laugh at her grief? Someone who one day was part of the group of people that she was never far away from, and only her ex's best friend nowadays. An annoying someone who drink too much and was always with a new girlfriend that never lasted long. Someone who had both parents alive.

"Because I'm an expert at pretending everything is okay when it sucks." he mumbled, never breaking eye contact. "I recognize this kind of fake smile anywhere. It's just that, most people are not worthy my comment on that." he finished.

She stood for a moment, waiting for something to happen, when a noise came from the backyard and she turned suddenly, making her arm touched slightly into Tyler's. A shiver went through her, and when she looked up he was looking at her mouth. A strange warm feeling began to buzz in her mind, and she just acted without stopping to think about what that meant, stepping forward and joining their lips.

He hesitated for a second before holding her waist with his free hand, gently but strongly. Elena opened her mouth and asked permission with her tongue, tasting alcohol when he mimicked her actions. It was a mixture of sloppy, like years ago, and a hunger she didn't know that lived inside her body. He was still soft and quiet, but much more skilled and confident about what to do. As she tried to pull him closer by the hair, a cold liquid fell on her belly, which made both of them open their eyes and notice that he still held the drink.

"I… sorry." he began, panting a little, putting the glass on the shelf that was by his right, but was interrupted when the brunette spoke deliberately.

"The door. Close it." she ordered, and without any warning took off her top, leaving only a white bra and shorts on. The boy looked dazed, but did as she had asked, no questions, coming back quickly to where she was still standing. She saw the inquiring look in him, and moved a little closer, placing her hands on his hips. She started lifting his shirt up, looking at his abs during the process, and when he got the message of what would happen, he raised his arms to help her, and then threw the clothes on the floor next to hers.

And just like that, the two were kissing again, his hands exploring her back while hers were around his neck. They were making out for a while, she was pressed against the wall, when Tyler moved and took them to the bed, walking while still glued at her. His knees touched the edge of the matress and they fell, making her giggle on top of him. She saw the smirk on his face, and then felt the volume in his pants touching her core, and stopped.

The growing sensation in her belly and the dark in his eyes made her move a little, just to cause some needed friction. She closed her eyes to delve into the feeling, but he got up and switched places, making his body cover hers, while his head leaned against her shoulder. He started kissing her neck, slowly, then her chest, earning a moan when he reached her covered nipple.

"I think we have too much clothes on." His eyes searching for permission into hers, as he found the clasp of her bra. "I mean, if we're really doing this." He caressed her skin.

"Ty, shut up." the lust in her eyes and her hand in his hair, showing him where he was needed. The other one joined his and helped him to take care of the piece of white lace. He proceded to take care of her stomach, letting a hot trail with his lips. The button of her shorts were quickly opened, followed by his, and when she knew, they were both naked.

She expected the weirdness of being in this situation with someone so out of her world to show up, but nothing came. Elena only felt the familiar, warm, and sometimes obnoxious scent of Tyler. He licked her clit, making her forget about any thoughts, and when his fingers found her wetness, he looked up and smirked again, knowing exactly what to do to send her crazy. He worked with his tongue for a while, and when her breath was short and her cheeks were flushed, she felt one finger entering her, moving wonderfully until he sucked where she wanted him to, and she had her first orgasm in more than one month.

The only clue that he had left the bed was a lack of weight in it, but if she was being honest, it was just when he was back that the girl noticed anything. She was still numb and breathing fast. The sound of something being ripped filled the air, and Tyler stroked her leg, getting close to her face and stealing a kiss.

"I don't know if you're on the pill." he looked at her, working on the condom. "But, anyway, I'm always prepared." he winked, rolling it into his hard length.

"I am... was. I really lost track of it in the last weeks." The sadness from when he entered the room were nowhere to be found, but the same anger was still there in her eyes. "But I _really_ don't wanna talk right now." She breathed and grabbed him, kissing his mouth, neck... anything that came into her way.

When she guided him to her entrance, they both moaned, enjoying the contact for a few seconds, until he started moving. It was so different than all the times with Matt, even it they'd had their rough nights of sex, the blond always made sure that she knew how much love was involved.

Now there were no mixed feelings. The only goal, for both of them, was pleasure. At each thrust he filled her completely, sometimes touching her g-spot and making it a lot better than before. Elena was mad at the world, so as she meet him in every move, pulling him closer with the legs around his back, and arms at his shoulders, she made sure to press her nails at his skin. It would probably leave a bruise afterwards, but this was not their concerns at the moment.

Tyler touched the side of her breasts, his hands playing with it until he put a nipple into his mouth, sucking with a bit of pleasurable pressure. He stopped and gave attention to the other one, making sure she was about to explode before returning to move his hips hard. He continued with this game for a while, until she pulled him by the hair for a kiss, and asked silently for release.

They both picked a faster pace, and he put his hand through their bodies to find her clit. She bit his lip, and he rubbed her button with his thumb, making her come harder than before. A few more thrusts were enough for him to spill inside her walls, that were still clenching with the aftershocks.

The sheets were a mess, but he lay down beside her in all their sweats, skin, and silence.

* * *

"I need to go." Elena was looking for her clothes, about half an hour had passed. "Jenna is probably not expecting me this late." She put on the top while watching him still lying in bed.

"Stop worrying, Gilbert." He smiled, staring at the parts of her body that were still bare. "I'm pretty sure your baby brother is giving her a lot more headache than you."

"One more reason to not disturb her." She sat beside him to put on her flat shoes. "I've brought enough damage to this family already." she mumbled, the hair falling in front of her face making it difficult to see what this subject made her feel.

"Hey, you've gotta stop doing this." He put his hands behind his head and looked at the ceiling. "You know, this guilt trip and all." He stated, as if it was a matter of fact.

"Look, Tyler, the sex was good, but now the magic is over and you don't get to pretend like you know me." She snorted, getting up and walking toward the door. "We don't have a real talk in about... I don't know, since we were kids. No need to catch up from my part." She stopped to catch the cellphone on the floor.

"Same here. I'm just saying, Elena, I make a lot of stupid things daily." He looked at her, wanting the eye contact. "The things we do, every choice has a reaction from the world. Good or bad, we can't help but interfere in the motion of things, you know? If we went back and fixed every bad thing that we did, wow." He went on "I'm pretty sure your dad screwed up with some girl on his time, and without it he would not meet your mom, therefore _you_ would not exist." He smiled, letting her know that the heavy part of the conversation was gone. "Pretty fucked up, uh?"

She stood there for a moment, thinking about what he had just said. Things were not gonna start to be easy again just after a one-night stand, she knew it. But Tyler had made a point, and even if she could not be free from the guilty just yet, the possibilty of getting better was there, at the back of her mind, for when she was ready. Elena gave him a ghost of a smile before leaving the bedroom, but she was sure he had noticed the "Thank you." inside her eyes before the door was shut.


End file.
